Quite some time nv blog le. Woking and sleeping. And fixing my stupid computer. Finally workable le. Figured out my ways. Test and try. Finally get into the main screen. And found a way to change the setting. Then the speaker is spoil. So sickening. Then now everything is ok le. Finally ah.....
Nowadays feel very lazy. Not mood to do anything after work. very shack. Very tired. Don't know why. Sleep early and wake up early. Really not like me le. So long nv go exercise, nv go for my sport le. So sian.
Today not so misty. Yesterday meet wen in the evening. It was so misty. Keep on cough on the way there. Went to watch chen long movie. It was a very funny 1. After movie, feel more fresh air. Not so misty le. Went to a void deck to chat.
Is money important. No. U can't bring it to death when u die. Also no use. Is friendship, kinship, relationship, or other important. I dont know. But i think it should be important. Is life important, I also dont know. I used to think that life is not important at all. I also think of wanted to end my life early. Die early better. But sometime when u are about to lose somthing then u know how precious and valuable that thing is. But sometime i still have the thoughts of wanting to die faster. Cause this world is cruel. Nothing is fair. U can only trust yrself and no one. betrayel is common. Hard to find someone who is sincere towards people. I know that i am not a gd person. I hate lying. But i have to lie to my family about my thing. I hate it. But i dont have the courage to say it. I am a coward. i am a weakling. i am a totally loser.
Living is a torture. Dying may be a gd thing
Today the weather is so misty, so hazy... Had a asthma attack during work. Really very dificult in breathing. Scared will have a relapse. So took some puffs 1st. Very shack these few days. Dont know is becos of the haze. Eyes itchy and pain. Everywhere is so smelly.
Will stop here.
Very demorale now. I am lost. I dont know what i should do. I have a lot of negative thoughts. I hate myself. I want to end everything. Can i do that. These people is torturing my life. They are making me insane. Can someone pls ask them to stop making me crazy. They are very bad people. They like to play mind games. They are hyprocrites. I hate them. what can i do. Sooner or later i will be tortured to death. I will surely jump off to death to ease the pain they had done. And i will surely seek revenge. MARK MY WORDS.................
I know that crying is of no use, and i hate crying. I wish to see these people get their retribution. But i dont know if i will live to see that.
GO TO HELL YOU THESE ASSHOLES.
Today very blur. Feel very tired. Dont know what is happening. Yesterday went to see doctor in the late night. Not feeling well. My heart is totally very pain. Took a pain killer injection. Then cant get to slp. Till dont know what time then get to slp. Very shack now. Heard my colleague called me. But she say she nv. she also got a shock y i keep on see her. Must be too tired le.
Really don know how to celebrate my birthday. No mood. The haze is making me very tired. Have put on weight. Very scary. Wanna slim down. Buut dont know how. Must be too long nv exercise le. Must find time to go swimming, and blading. If can go for light jogging. And see who wanna go strolling. Haha......
Weather have been bad lately. Everyone around me seems to be feeling unwell. I am so missing G***. Feel like messagin him. But i know i cannot. Cos he got GF already. How i wish i can hug him and tell him my things, having him by my side, to support me to carry on. With his smile it will surely brighten my day and make my day so gd. But none of this will happen.
I will stop here
Ni pen down
